Monday, October 14, 2013

Physical

I realized this morning that my carpet had moved from

embarrassing

to unbearable,

and pulled out the carpet cleaner.

I lugged it up the stairs with dread,

knowing that any activity

when added to toddler

equals ten times the work.

As he followed me around the room

strategically sitting in front of wherever I was cleaning,

I had an epiphany:

All over town I see these "boot camp" places

where people go to kick themselves into shape,

and I came up with a plan!

For those needing a workout,

but don't have the time,

simply add a random toddler to your day.

Sprinting across the office to remove a child from the printer

every two and half minutes really burns off the calories!

And sharing a meal with any toddler can cut your food input

quite quickly

either from the constantly picking up the food they are throwing,

while wrestling their resisting body back into a high chair,

or being forced to give half of your own food away

because your food mysteriously looks more appetizing to them

than their own,

(even though it's exactly the same).

 No more need to pay for daycare,

simply call it the newest craze in workouts!

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