Fair

So a friend suggested I actually tell how I feel about "fair", so I'm gonna!

Fair is not fair.

Think about it for just a minute, and you'll see how ridiculous the idea even is.

When most people think of fair, what they really mean is "I want my way and I'm not gettin' it", or "I want the most and you have it."

Now how is that "fair"?

For example, two kids want ice cream, you dish some up, one has more than the other, the "not fair" declaration is made.  But I bet it's the kid with less making the declaration.  And I bet if the bowls were switched, they'd be OK with the whole situation.

Which brings me to Fair Day.

We've only had to actually have fair day twice, and that was enough for my kiddos.  It didn't take long for them to understand "fair" is NOT fair.  And the second Fair Day?  My big kids cried, because they still remembered the last one.

On Fair Day, everyone gets up at the same time.  Because it wouldn't be fair if someone got to sleep longer than the rest, would it?  Well, it just so happens that one of my kids is an early riser.  So we ALL had to get up early.

I get to choose the clothes on fair day.  Because everyone has to dress pretty much the same.  So it's "fair".

Then it's time for chores.  Usually, the each have one chore to do, they get it done nice and quick, then on to breakfast.  But on fair day, we all do all the chores together!  Why?  Because each of them has a favorite, and least favorite chore.  It wouldn't be fair if one kid was happy to get a chore while the rest suffered by not doing their favorite, right?  The result?  Chores on Fair Day take a while, and everyone is HUNGRY when we're done,  and a bit frustrated because they keep getting in each others way.

Now, we're on to breakfast.  Where I measure the food.  And everyone eats plain oatmeal.  Why?  Because it wouldn't be fair if we ate eggs, because that's Princess' favorite, and Buddy hates them.  So it has to be something they all love, or hate, equally.  And I'm NOT serving ice cream for breakfast!  So, they gag down the oatmeal.  And since we have to stay fair, you can't leave the table until everyone eats all of it.  Because it wouldn't be fair if one kid got more, or less, than another.

Do you see where this is going????

When one kid needs to use the potty, the rest stand outside the door and wait.  It wouldn't be fair for them to play while the other can't.

We can only read books that the youngest can understand.  It wouldn't be fair to read books above his comprehension lever, would it?

We do school work that the youngest can do.  It wouldn't be fair if one got to do something the others don't have the ability to do.

We can only play with toys the youngest can enjoy.  It wouldn't be fair to play with something the youngest can't understand.

Fair day has never made it much past lunch before everyone is begging to be done.

And NONE of my kids EVER says "That's not FAIR!", because the know what I will say:

"The fair is where pigs go to get ribbons. "

There's no such thing as fair.