Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The Care and Keeping of Buddy

I've spoken before about Buddy's lack of weight gain, and how astonishingly scrawny he is, but not how it continues to be a struggle.  Because of his sensory processing disorder, he does not have a good connection with the message his body sends him.  For every day life, that means he eats only when prompted, and not because he feels hungry.  This also means that if he's in a hurry to get back to a good book or activity after a meal, he eats what is on his plate, then bolts from the table without considering if he should go back for seconds.  On sick days, like we had last week, it means he could send himself into dehydration simply by self neglect.  We do work to get extra calories into him, and have had great results with adding coconut milk to his diet, but it's a constant tightrope walk.  We want him to have the skills to make his own decisions, and the skills to take care of himself, but also need to keep him healthy.

So I'm calling out for advice from spectrum moms:  How do I let my teenager have the independence he so craves, and not be a naggy-mom, but still make sure he's actually consuming enough calories to sustain not just his daily life, but the fact that he's also growing at an astonishing rate?

6 comments:

RaD said...

Well, honestly I don't have a kid in that position, but have you tried talking to him and getting him on board with what would work for him. Maybe a chart with protein servings, fruits and veggies, milk products, grains, and water and let him know how much he should be eating of each one every day, then letting him keep track and check it off. Then it would take some of the pressure off of you and maybe help him balance. Just a thought I'd throw out there. It's probably what I would try if all else had failed.

Katie said...

My kids ask for food about every 20 minutes while awake and I don't have teenagers, so I'm not sure I have the proper authority to be dishing out advice on this one. With my more forgetful patients, I suggest using a timer (like a cell phone alarm) to go off at certain times of the day as a reminder to take their meds. This way you wouldn't be the one nagging at snacktime. Also, I can't remember all of his dietary intolerances, but peanut butter and nuts pack a lot of calories in just a couple of bites.

Katie said...

My kids ask for food about every 20 minutes while awake and I don't have teenagers, so I'm not sure I have the proper authority to be dishing out advice on this one. With my more forgetful patients, I suggest using a timer (like a cell phone alarm) to go off at certain times of the day as a reminder to take their meds. This way you wouldn't be the one nagging at snacktime. Also, I can't remember all of his dietary intolerances, but peanut butter and nuts pack a lot of calories in just a couple of bites.

MoonNStarMommy said...

We just found out that our 3 year old (almost 4) is on the spectrum. So I'm looking for other parents and stumbled upon you. Our son also has major weight issues, he was also diagnosed with a type of dwarfism. He's going to be 4 in April and is only 21 lbs ... so I feel ya there. We still are trying to figure it all out too, and probably will until who knows when ...

Karen Dawkins said...

My daughter has sensory processing disorder, and she is only 6, so still pretty easy to manage. My son, age 13, is on the spectrum, but not so extremely. We homeschool too. When he gets grumpy with me, I ask him when he last ate and what he needs next. When he grumbles, I send him to his room until he figures out what he needs.

He can spend whole days in his room (not what I want for him), but he comes out eventually, apologizes and then eats. And spends the whole evening catching up on school.

Usually, things run more smoothly. We keep a supply of quick and ready foods that he can grab and eat. We encourage snacking - I know!!! Not normal advice! I keep a bowl of nuts and dried, no sugar added fruit on the table where he does his school. He snacks and doesn't realize I got food in him :) No battle, either. I offer smoothies a few times a week -- and add protein powder to his. Again, sneaking it in.

Praying for wisdom for you.

BTW, I found you through blogfrog and I'm so excited. A homeschooling mom with integration kids at home. How amazing. Sometimes, I feel like I'm all alone! YAY for BFF's :)

Queen of pink in a house of blue said...

would he wear a watch, i know with a sensory kid, that might not work. if not, what about a clock with an alarm, or timer. every 2 hours (or whatever works to help him gain), it's a reminder to eat or drink something. he can have pre-made bags of healthy snacks or drinks (possibly protein drinks, smoothie, nuts, milk shakes with added protein, etc).
it would be a reminder without you having to do the reminding (and what seems like nagging to him).

good luck!